Breaking bad news to someone …

Did you ever see the movie Capricorn One? It was a bomb. Kinda. I still remember it and it was my introduction to conspiracy theories. There’s a scene with one of the astronauts … he is talking to himself while trying to escape. He’s about to be caught and killed by the government. The dialog is this:

Phil goes on vacation to Europe and leaves his favorite cat, Max, with his younger brother James. While in Europe, Phil calls James to check on his cat, and asks: “So, James, how’s my Max doing?”

James very tersely says, “Your cat is dead.”

“What!?” says Phil, astonished. “You can’t just tell someone that his favorite cat is dead without a warning! You have to ease him into it.”

“How?” asks James.

“Well, the first day I call, tell me my cat is on the roof,” remarked Phil. “Then tell me the cat is going to be fine and not to worry. The next day, when I call to ask about my cat, tell me that you were about to get her down, when she jumped off of the roof and broke her leg. Tell me the doctors say the cat will be okay, but it will have to stay at the vet’s for a while. Are you getting all of this?”

“Yes,” says James”

“Good,” remarks Phil. “Then the next day, when I call back, tell me that there was severe internal bleeding that the vet didn’t pick up, and that my favorite cat died at 2:00 this morning. That way it won’t be such a shock to me. Got it?”


“Good, so, how’s Grandma doing?” asks Phil.

“Well,” James replies, “She’s on the roof….”


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