Great Sex!

When was the last time you had really great sex? Yeah, that’s a little off the usual banter for this blog, but it got you reading didn’t it? 🙂

Gold and silver hit the rubber floor and took a bounce. Not a big one. A tiny one. Gold closed up at $607.50 and silver closed up at $12.260. Gold has hard resistance at $622 so it has to break that today or tomorrow to recover otherwise it might just hang around it’s current price for a while. Silver has the best chance to beat resistance at $12.50. Once it does it’ll make a run for $14.

The new year is well under way. 8 days down and only 357 more to go. Did you make any resolutions? Are you sticking to them? If you are a member of my local Y, please tell me you have already decided to give up on going to the Y. And that exercising is too hard. Please understand that I do want you to get into shape. But you are making my workouts harder to get done. There is a set group of regulars I see at the Y. And we know each other. Now there is this huge influx of people. The exercise room is not bad when it’s just the usuals. The usuals know what they are doing. They don’t take forever to setup a machine. They respect the rules. You know the rules I’m talking about. The unspoken ones. The ones that anyone who uses the Y equipment on a regular basis follow. Not sure what they are? OK, I’ll list them. MAYBE they will help you to become one of the usuals and not one of the rezos (a resolutionist – is that a word? one of the people who try to get in shape but end up quitting by mid Feb). Here’s da rules:

  1. Get a towel when you come in the door. The Y provides them for free. They are provided to keep things a little healthier. When you workout and start to sweat you need to dry off the equipment when you are done. If you are on a machine that you have to rest your head on, put the towel down on the bench first then put your head on it.
  2. Reset the machines to 0 (zero) pounds when you finish. I’m getting tired of having to re-adjust weights because someone didn’t do it.
  3. Log off the Fitlinxx console. Or next time I’ll dork with your weight settings. It’s not that hard to do. When you finish your set, press the done button.
  4. When the Y is crowded, only do one set per machine and move on to the next. If you do more than one set and you see someone waiting for a machine move on to the next machine and come back, don’t just sit there and do another set! Believe it or not there is a sign on each of the machines reminding you of this rule.
  5. If you aren’t sure of what you are doing, get a Y staff member to follow you from machine to machine for a few workouts. That’s why they are there. They are paid to make sure you know what you are doing and don’t hurt yourself or others. There’s nothing worse than trying to keep your heart rate up and having to stop, have your heart rate drop and waiting for someone who obviously does not know what they are doing. I’ve done my share of “helping” people figure out what they are doing and it’s getting old. I took the time to learn from the staff and tried really hard to not inconvenience anyone. So should you.
  6. Wear proper workout clothes. I can spend hours on this topic! Working out in jeans and a t-shirt doesn’t cut it. It can’t be comfortable and it labels you as a rezo. Sweats or shorts work best along with sneakers/tennis/running/crosstrainers (what ever you want to call them). Athletic shoes are essential. Leather shoes, flats or hiking boots don’t cut it. Go buy a a pair from Wal-Mart. WM sells cheap athletic shoes – $16.88. I ought to know, I wear them when I lift. I wear real running shoes to run in. And if you pick the right shoes at WM they go with anything you would wear to workout. You know, unless you are in somewhat good shape, spandex is not for you.
  7. I guess this would be more of a 6a than a 7, but guys (and gals), if you have to do workouts that require you to spread your legs, wear something other than cheap gym shorts. Wear UnderArmor or some other longer underwear with them. Or get shorts with liners or shorts that are longer. The last thing you need to be doing is giving someone a show they don’t want to see while they are working out across from you. For that reason and that reason alone, I ALWAYS wear sweat pants … ALWAYS!
  8. Clean up before coming in. Sweating while there is OK, but coming in with a bed head and smelling like you didn’t shower after your last workout is not good for those around you. If you cannot smell yourself, have someone you know smell you. If they think you stink, at least put on deodorant or spray yourself with some Febreeze … PLEASE! I don’t want to smell you and neither does anyone else.
  9. Wearing headphones while you workout and listening to your own music is fine. I encourage it actually. It makes the time go by quicker. But please, for everyone’s sake, don’t sing out loud. You cannot carry a tune.
  10. No gawking! Yeah, she’s wearing spandex and a thong (and yes you can tell it’s a thong because she worked real hard to find the right spandex pants to not cover the top of the thong and to be tight enough to show that there are no other possible panty lines) and something that would barely classify itself as a sports bra and she looks great, but gawking slows you down and that slows everyone else down. Besides it’s just wrong. Don’t gawk and encourage her. She doesn’t need it! She could barely fit her head in the doors as it is!

That’s enough ranting for now …

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7 Comments

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7 responses to “Great Sex!

  1. While I am only an occasional Y visitor, I follow most all of those rules. My waistline is the only give away that I am not a regular.

    All of your rules are spot on. Which Y do you frequent? I can be found in Springboro on my days off and on rare occasion I stop into Kettering’s Y.

    I might be making an attempt next month. I never resolve at the new year to work out. I dont like failure. SO..maybe next month..

  2. I go to the Y in Lebanon. I was not too fond of the Springboro Y. Especially since that is where I saw a well known local “pastor” breaking rule number 9. I am surprisedd he doesn’t have neck problems the way his head snapped around. The workout room at the Lebanon Y is bigger and does not back up the way the one in ‘boro does.

  3. gee whiz! I just went back through this post and I’m not sure what spell checker I used but shooes is not a word … needless to say I fixed the errors I found. if you find any others let me know.

  4. Alicia

    deodorant
    Febreeze

  5. LOL! I knew I could count on you!

  6. Alicia

    Here’s another suggestion: Don’t check your sick kids into the nursery, stay home.

  7. That is a good one. Any others?

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